On Monday I’m back to work.
It’s been a fun 15 days away from work.
Still have 20 days left of vacation time.
I think the first 7 days I barely got out of bed.
Dreamland is such a pleasant place to visit, so much nicer than reality.
The rest of the time I was getting out of bed super, super late.
Tuesday I’ve got an appointment with my nurse practitioner. I’ll have a pretty interesting decision to make.
He’s kinda apprehensive. He wants to know if I’ve ever had any involvement in the trans community before. I told him that I had been involved with some groups in the mid ’00s, but the fact that I’m a socially isolated loner meant that I didn’t stick around them for too long.
Beside, I don’t want to transition into a woman. I want to transition into neither. Not male. Not female.
Sex has been an unmitigated disaster for me.
To officially be neither, but to have bits of both intrigues me.
My NP has warned me that I’m pretty old and my masculine features are pretty hard set. I told him that I’m fine with that, that I’m not looking to be female. I just don’t want anything associated with male.
He cautioned me that people might not be too accepting.
I’m covered in tattoos from head to toe.
I have a lot of facial piercings.
I wear dresses and heels.
I work with trades that are normally dominated by “Real Manly Men….. Grrrrrr(tm)(c)”
At work I put up with people who won’t give me the time of day due to the way I am.
Having breasts and less muscle mass isn’t going to be much of a game changer for me.
And really, I’ve seen guys with bigger breasts than I intend to have. They usually call those “Molson Man Tiddies”…… but I digress.
The NP says that there is a risk of blood clot and stroke with taking oral or intramuscular Estrogen at my stage in life. Fine, dermal patch it will be.
The lawyers are still working away on the class action, nothing to report on that front.
I am beginning to accept that the DOJ and the DND will succeed in their endeavour to hide this mess from the public.
Sometimes I wonder if things would have been better off and if I listened to Richard’s warning to me about sticking my nose into this shit. Sure, knowing the truth about Canadian Forces Base Namao is one thing. But knowing the truth really hasn’t changed anything. Pedophiles and child molesters who had successful careers in the Canadian Armed Forces prior to 1998 and who got away with their crimes due to the 3-year-time-bar flaw and the summary investigation flaw get to enjoy their retirement knowing that they can’t ever be touched by military or civilian tribunals. And the victims of these perverts get laughed at by the Canadian Armed Forces and the Department of National Defence because neither of these agencies can be compelled by any civilian authority to admit that these flaws impacted children living on the bases.
Until next time……..
Beeshive 